avocados-and-evergreens

girls!!! we gotta fail more often!!! we’re so scared of failure and disappointing people and looking stupid that we don’t even TRY things! men?? men brush off failure like it’s nothing! if a man doesn’t get a job he wanted, it’s because they didn’t review his application fairly! it’s because the competition was tough this year! it’s because he just needs to try harder next time! men just DO things!!! and you know what DOING things builds?? confidence!!! even if you fail!! the more you fail, the more confident you are that you can fail and survive! women don’t even wanna try unless they are 100% certain that they’re qualified and competent and won’t disappoint anybody! but that is NONSENSE. men are out there getting positions they’re not even qualified for, while over-qualified but less-confident women are staying where it’s safe bc they’re afraid to rock the boat!!! DO. IT. apply for the thing! ask for the raise! enter the competition! get used to failing ALL the time! fail quickly and move on!!! if a cocky but mediocre man would do it, then for the love of god, GO DO THE DAMN THING. you are SO much more qualified than you think you are.

peachyczerny

I LOVE YOU

poppy-pipopapo

highly recommend blocking ppl just because u don't like their vibe. even if they seem nice and haven't done anything wrong, but you just don't like them for reasons you can't articulate? slam that block button. your experience on this website will be improved for it. blocking isn't a moral judgment its just a way to exercise control over your space

johannas-motivational-insults

I mean, yes, but also consider that people who have RSD, self-esteem issues, and/or a history of bullying/ostracization can be severely triggered by getting blocked for no reason. It can send people into spirals of overanalyzing what they could have done wrong and drowning in feelings about how they’re terrible and everybody hates them. Spirals like that can last for hours or days and be extremely debilitating. While I understand the intent here of curating your own space and making your experience as stress-free as possible, you need to understand there can be consequences of that that you’re totally unaware of. And if you don’t feel you should have to worry about other people’s mental health or you don’t have the energy to, that’s fine, block away, but this is something I think needs to be said and not nearly enough people understand or consider.

poppy-pipopapo

hi! if you come into my space and make me uncomfortable I’m completely within my rights to remove you from my space and don’t owe you any explanation. I have adhd and struggle with rsd and I know what it’s like but I’m going to be completely blunt - if a stranger on the internet who you’ve never interacted with blocks you, and that sends you into a spiral, that’s not their fault and is something you need to discuss with a therapist. it is not my problem, just like my reaction to being blocked is not your problem. it’s really, really not cool to make your symptoms and your disordered thinking other people’s responsibility

lilcowgirl7-deactivated20210223

Long lasting friendships and relationships require such intense levels of compassion and gentleness and willingness to understand on both sides like that’s what I’ve found to be the secret. Whenever I feel guilty for cutting ties with somebody I ask if they were passionate and gentle and willing to understand (not assimilate, understand) and the answer is always no and then I feel better. Because if it’s a no then your compassion and gentleness and willingness to understand will always fail to be a virtue in that space. It like works against you in the most insidious ways. Jaded - Drake.mp3 was on a loop for three hours the evening I realized that

vampireapologist

learning to let go and learning to relax means just freaking sticking those stickers on something. stop worrying if it’s the right place. burn that nice candle you’ve had for a year. it doesn’t need a special occasion. I’m gonna use those fancy soaps I’ve been collecting in a drawer even though they look so pretty and it means I’ll use them up. everything is temporary so just enjoy the littlest pleasures you can possibly have we all need to just let go and enjoy things while they last. the sticker’s gonna look fine on your water bottle I promise

bpdelicacy

daily reminder that you are not your past. and when i say it, i mean that you are not the bad things you did when you were not okay if today you can see you were wrong and wouldn’t do it again. you are not what you suffered in your past. you are not equal to the person who made you suffer. you are not the negative things you remember from your past.

you are here right now.
you exist.
and you are amazing for doing it.

horreurscopes

i have never felt as mature as when i finally understood (through therapy) and internalized (through emotional work) that you cannot connect and communicate with some people no matter how kind, compassionate, understanding, articulate, eloquent, or smart you are, and that sometimes a person not listening to you does not reflect on your communication skills or ability to connect or straight up intelligence. in a way, it’s letting go of the belief that you have the power to make people understand you. communication is a two-way street, and needs two willing participants. some people are just walls, and it has been unbelievably helpful for my mental and emotional health to let it slide and know that it does not affect me or my self worth. 

nawaffs

fall in love with someone who wants you, who waits for you. who understands you even in the madness, someone who helps you, and guides you, someone who is your support, and your hope. fall in love with someone who talks with you after a fight. fall in love with someone who misses you and wants to be with you. do not fall in love only with a body or a face or with the idea of being in love

nsg-7

Stop being so available to a person that always puts you last.